“An animal can be sacred and delicious.”

Sitting and anticipating my own Thanksgiving holiday, I must say I love the time of year all the TV specials begin airing. There’s Thanksgiving Charlie Brown. Home Alone.

Tonight, 8PM EST on CBS, we get Sheldon throwing up on a lot of clowns.

Happy turkey day.

No, no, I’m kidding. As one #CoolTVProps fan put it, this episode was the funniest aired in some time. Lots of poking fun, but what’s a holiday where a distant relative (or neighbor) doesn’t bruise someone’s feelings? Even if that relative happens to be a three-years distance husband you didn’t know you had.

Penny, en route to Mrs. Wolowitz’s house for Thanksgiving dinner with the group, discovered happenstantially that, yes, Las Vegas wedding chapels were real and licensed. And thus, for three years (or however many years now, on this show), she’s been married to her ex-boyfriend Zack. During the episode argument to follow, we see yet again Leonards’ failure to recognize what anyone else might be feeling past himself, and again Penny’s failure to communicate what she’s feeling. But I liked the sneak peek at the end over coffee—sounds like there might be more bridal bells in the future. For love this time. Or money.

While the girls and Raj prepare the meal, Bernadette sends Howard to try and warm up to her cold-as-ice father. He however, creature of habit, bonds instead with the only other person who didn’t want to be there: Sheldon. Sheldon so much so he broke PC the whole car ride across town. Get a couple beers in the Texan genius, and he’s no better, but he at least demonstrates a different…almost kinder?...side to his nature. Sheldon, bonding with anyone. Imagine!

And so, as many Thanksgiving specials should relate, they agree that family is family, no matter how broken or small. But always blame the husband if he’s never around. It’s faster.

And you thought I'd forget "Slapsgiving"

After Black Friday (weekend) and all the hullaballoo to follow the traditional Thanksgiving festival, I’m sure more than a few shoppers deserved a little slaps-giving themselves. Your treat.

Though that’s not quite what I mean when I use the term. No, “slapsgiving” is a How I Met Your Mother trope. Marshall coined the phrase when he taunted Barney with his upcoming “third slap,” in the third season of the series.

Third slap? Let me refresh your memories:

To be concise, blunt, and to horrify you negligent watchers with lack of details, I’ll only say this: Barney and Marshall held a “slap bet” on whether or not Robin had ever done porn in her life (part of the potential reasons why Robin “hates malls,” the initial subject of the bet). Revealing the opening to an old music-video number she created, Barney mistook the video for porn and pre-emptively slapped Marshall.

He…was wrong. The eighties-trend video was not, in fact, pornography.
Despite the understandable confusion, Lily gave Barney two options: either to receive ten slaps from Marshall then and there, or be surprised by five slaps at random, for the rest of eternity. Barney chose the latter; thus far, to his disfavor.

And the season three Thanksgiving episode--the first where Marshall and Lily are married--threatens Barney with Marshall’s third “slap.” Back to present.

To make their first Thanksgiving a true success, Lily decides there shall be no slap-giving. Only gracious presents. Although, during the last ten seconds of Marshall withholding his slap, Barney oversteps the line (again) by taunting Marshall for the grief he imposed throughout the day. To which, siding with Marshall, the Slap Bet Commissioner (Lily) lets Marshall slap Barney three seconds early.

Cue, “You Just Got Slapped.”

Barney received his fourth slap thus far, once again on Thanksgiving, making Thanksgiving in the Marshall-Lily household one for the wincing. The fifth slap has thus far been uncalled.
Thus far.