"I've seen things."

How does every cast member answer what their true love gave them on the first day of Christmas? Judging by their holiday daydreams, I’d first ask who was their true love of the hour. Then I could guess how Sheldon Cooper WOULDN’T reply.

Excuse me: Uncle Dr. Cooper.

That’s right, Sheldon’s sister is having a baby boy this holiday season, and Sheldon departed for Texas to take part in the home birth. Meanwhile, the rest of the cast (and Stuart) came over to the fourth-floor abode to decorate the tree and reminisce on episodes of season’s passed.

One small segue later and the team discover they actually wouldn’t be connected in the way they thought had it not been for their esteemed friend and roommate. This, of course, leaves them to wonder what their lives would be like Sheldon-less. In the holiday spirit of It’s a Wonderful Life, The Big Bang Theory team unravels what I could only dub a fangirl’s wish episode sprung to life.

While Sheldon’s brutally scarred by witnessing the live birth, Leonard, Penny, Amy, Howard, Raj, and Bernadette par down who they might have met instead, who they’d have to do without, and what paths would have never crossed at all.

Stuart jumps in from time to time.

Deep breath all:

Penny would have still lived across the hall from Sheldon, and according to Amy would thusly have fallen madly in love with the double Ph.D. On the other hand, she would ultimately end up with someone like Zack, who handles himself better than Leonard while Leonard lives (and consumes inordinate amounts of food) with Raj and Stuart, leaving Howard to violently revere his late mother and Amy to celebrate birthdays alone.
Bernie might have more or less progressed.

How’s this for a holiday number? Should Amy and Sheldon’s relationship shift by the end of the season? Should they repeat their holiday special next year?