Guys. I Got A New Bro.

I know I talk incessantly about my life goal to become Barney “Bro” Stinson, and scrutinize his every waking moment to see what I might do to reach his tier (pity I couldn’t borrow his Bro Code; I had to get my own instead).

But I haven’t gone over just what types of things I listen out for, specifically within his specific vernacular. And that raises the question—what Barney Stinson sayings top everyone’s lists? I need to pay attention to the needs of Barney’s other pandering fans, as well.

And so, I bring the top five best Barney Stinson-isms, as written by all of you, while CBS airs the tear-jerking, soulful episode of how he acquires his new bro “to beat all other bros’.” Sobs.

#1 “True Story”

Told before stories that may or may not be true. But what am I saying—of course they’re all true! Just take a look at the Jesus parenthetical: “That's why we wait three days to call a woman, because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait.... True story.” Of course.

#2 “Legen…wait for it…dary!”

Barney’s choice cliff-hanger, reserved for the not-quite-compound adjective. Of the more famous appearances include Barney really making us ‘wait for it,’ like ending an entire season with the stall. Or with quotes like these: “It’s gonna be legend…wait for it…and I hope you’re not lactose intolerant because the second half of that word is DAIRY!“

#3 “Bro”

Everyone is bro. Bro is everyone. Much like ‘dude,’ “bro” is gender-inclusive.

#4 “Suit up!”

Everyone knows suits top all the charts, except maybe Ted. Ted really should start wearing a suit more often.

#5 “Article ____:”

When Barney needs to cite The Bro Code, you know you’ve done wrong. Example references include, “Article 2: "A Bro is always entitled to do something stupid, as long as the rest of his Bros are all doing it,”” and “Article 24: "When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may position the brim at either 12 or 6 o’clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers and the handicapped.””

Have your own? Did I leave any glaring gaps? Show me the error of my ways by sending Cool TV Props a message, or commenting on this post! Now!